Who Are You Looking For?
“Moreover, if your brother sins against you, tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother. But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that every word may be established by the mouth of two or three witnesses.” And if he refuses to hear them, tell the church. But if he refuses to hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector.”
“Assuredly, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loosed on earth will be loosed in heaven.” Matthew 18:15-18
“Oh my, I need to get myself ready and be on my way; this is the day the LORD has made, and I don’t want to miss anything the Lord has planned for me.”
Joppa says as she tries to hurry herself out. She and Millo began attending school together. Millo may have been waiting for her, but he was not a patient little bird. He was always in a hurry.
“I wonder why Millo isn’t here pecking at my door?” Joppa says as she finally walks out and closes the door. “Oh well, he probably was here; I may not have heard him; he may have gone ahead.”
As Joppa hurries to school, she sees Millo with his head down in a hole.
“Millo, why is your head stuck in that hole, did you miss the mark again, and get your beak stuck on something in there, or are you looking for something”?
“Go away!” Millo’s voice echoes from the hole.
“Hum, that sounds familiar, Joppa says as she remembers the many times she had buried her head in the sand.
“Would you like to talk about it Millo”? “Did something happen, or is there something you would rather not deal with?’ I tend to bury my head in the sand when something is bothering me”.
“I don’t want to talk about it right now,” Again, Millo echoes from the hole.
Joppa quietly sits next to Millo, waiting patiently until he is ready to talk, which isn’t long because Millo cannot keep silent for too long.
“They were mean to me.” He sniffles as he ruffles his feathers and straightens up.
“What happened? Who was mean to you?” Joppa asks, straightening her head and looking around for the bullies. She is ready to fight for her little buddy.
“My classmates didn’t want me to be part of their group; they ignored me and left me alone. The teacher said I needed to join a group. I asked a group if I could sit with them, and the leader said no, no one wanted me. I was so sad. I felt stupid because I am not as smart as they are, and when I tried to be part of the experiment, they made me feel more stupid!” Millo began to cry again.
“I am so sorry for the harm they caused you, Millo,” says Joppa as she hugs her little friend and tries to console him. “But first, you are not stupid; you are the smartest, bravest little bird I know. You are always willing to try something new, and even when things don’t turn out as you hope, you fly to the next great adventure! You may be small but have a big heart and are a wise little creature. I am happy you are my friend. I remember when you came flying into my life and helped me get out of the hole of despair. I thought you were as annoying as a fly, but you didn’t give up on me. You are my best friend!”
One day, Rafi-owl told me, “What you hear with your ears goes to your soul, and what you will find is You!” I didn’t understand what he meant until one day, I put on some clothes that did not fit me, and I didn’t like the style either, but I thought if I dressed like everyone else, they would like me. I could make myself fit in the group. I was so uncomfortable all day. I wanted to hurry home and take those clothes off! You see, that day, I found me. I found who I am in Christ. I like me; I am comfortable in my feathers, happy just the way I am because I am who I am, and God made you perfectly the way you are”.
“Really, do you really believe that God wants me to find who I am, so I can be happy in my own feathers as well, because, I was getting a little bored, I wasn’t interested in that class anyhow; I couldn’t understand. It’s not my kind of seed, and that doesn’t make me stupid right? It just means that I should do what I do best, and that is being me, I like me too, and I am happy when I can just be me!” Says Millo.
“Yes, Millo,” says Joppa. Yes, I believe you just found what you were looking for. I think you found yourself! “
Conclusion
From my own experience, suppressing my pain led me down a path of destruction. I grew up dealing with anxiety and depression. I lost all hope and had no control over my negative thoughts, and that can lead to an eruption of emotions, bad life choices, and health problems, which can be deadly. By seeking counseling, I have learned so much about myself and how I do not have to subject myself to other’s opinions of me, nor do I have to submit to their bad behavior; I can walk away unscathed by their hurtful words because what they are dealing with is not my fault, nor my responsibility.
Groupies: Sadly, there are Groupies in every environment. There are Groupies in the school environment, work environment, churches, and worst are the Groupies amongst relatives. I have experienced all. I stay clear of groupies, especially those who gossip, lie, or are rude to others. If they gossip about another, you can be sure you will be the next!
Don Nemeth, (DNA Counseling).
Don Nemeth was a massive part of my healing in this mental health journey. I have been setting little nuggets of his wisdom through Storytelling with Joppa and Millo. Joppa means Beauty and the meaning of Millo is Merciful. Jesus has also taught me, through Joppa and Millo’s humor, that laughter produces healing to the soul and body. I am beginning to be kinder to myself and set boundaries. People pleasing drains your life.
Jesus says, “What we bind on earth is bound in heaven.”
What we allow binds us. I was bound to People Pleasing, which is oppressive because we are always looking for the approval of others.
I am learning not to take other people’s opinions to heart; God’s approval and opinion of me are all that matters, making me free to be me. Joppa and Millo are merciful and compassionate, and they search for beauty in their wreckage because they know that God can and will make beauty out of their ashes. They acknowledge each other’s pain and hurts and do not dismiss or condemn them even when they don’t quite understand the details. They are learning how to have fellowship by sharing God’s love through edification and prayer and lifting each other with the Word of God. I hope you enjoy this next story; it also brings you laughter, enlightenment, and healing.
May your friendships help you find the person God created you to be—a friend of God and a friend to yourself. When you like yourself, nothing can oppress your inner being; you set boundaries and are kind to your person; others will see your freedom and glorify the Father because it is only through His Grace through Christ Jesus that you have received such liberty.