What Are You Looking For?
By Lisa Rene Delgado
“Oh my, oh my, I need to get myself ready, and be on my way; the day is new, and I don’t want to miss anything the Lord has planned for me” Joppa says as she tries to hurry herself out. She and Millo began to attend school together; Millo may be waiting on her, and he is not a very patient little bird because he is always in hurry.
“I wonder why Millo isn’t here pecking at my door yet, Joppa says as she finally walks out and closes the door. “Oh well, he probably was here; I may not have heard him; he may have gone ahead”.
As Joppa hurries to school she sees Millo with his head down in a hole.
“Millo, why is your head stuck in that hole, did you miss the mark again, and get your beak stuck on something in there, or are you looking for something”?
“Go away”! Millo’s voice echoes from the hole.
“Hum, that sounds familiar, Joppa says as remembers the many times she had buried her head the sand.
“Would you like to talk about it Millo”? “Did something happen, or is there something you would rather not deal with?’ I tend to bury my head in the sand when something is bothering me”.
“I don’t want to talk about it right now”, Millo echoes from the hole again.
Joppa quietly sits next to Millo and waits patiently until he is ready to talk, which wasn’t very long because Millo cannot keep silent for too long.
“They were mean to me” He sniffles, as he ruffles his feathers and straightens up.
“What happened, who was mean to you”?
“My classmates, they didn’t want me to be part of their group, they ignored me, and left me standing alone. And when I was told by the teacher that I needed to join a group. I asked a group if I can sit with them, and the leader said no, no one wanted me. I was so sad. I felt stupid because I am not as smart as they are, and when I tried to be part of the experiment, they made me feel more stupid!”
“I am so sorry for the pain they caused you, Millo”, says Joppa as she hugs her little friend and tries to console him. “But first, you are not stupid, you are the smartest, bravest little bird I know. You are always willing to try something new, and even when things don’t turn out as you hope, you fly to the next great adventure; you are small, with a big heart, and a wise little creature. I am happy you are my friend. Remember, when you came flying into my life and helped me get out of the hole of despair. I thought you were as annoying as fly, but you did not give up on me. When I was in the hole, Rafi-owl told me, “What you hear with your ears goes to your soul, and what you will find is You”! I did not understand what he meant at first Millo, but one day, I put on some clothes that did not fit me, and I really didn’t like the style either, but I thought if I dressed like everyone else, they would like me. I thought I can make myself fit in the group. I was so uncomfortable all day, and I just wanted to hurry home to take those clothes off! You see, that day I found me. I found who I am in Christ. I like me, I am comfortable in my own feathers, I am happy just the way I am because I am who I am, and God made you perfectly the way you are”.
“Really, do you really believe that God wants me to find who I am, so I can be happy in my own feathers as well, because, I was getting a little bored, I just wasn’t interested in that class anyhow; I couldn’t understand that stuff, because I wasn’t interested in that stuff, and that doesn’t make me stupid right? It just means that I should do what I do best, and that is being me, I like me too, and I am happy when I can just be me”! Says Millo.
“Yes, Millo”, says Joppa, “Yes, I believe you just found what you were looking for. I believe you found you”!
Conclusion
From my own experience, suppressing my pain led me down a path of destruction. I grew up dealing with anxiety, depression and a death wish because I lost all hope and had no control over my negative thoughts, and that can lead to an eruption of emotions, bad life choices, and health problems which can be deadly. By seeking counseling I have learned so much about myself, and how I do not have to subject myself to other’s opinions of me, nor do I have to submit to their bad behavior; I can walk away unscathed by their hurtful words because what ever they are dealing with is not my fault, nor my responsility.
Groupies: Sadly, there are Groupies in every environment. There are Groupies in the school environment, work environment, churches, and worst are the Groupies amongst relatives. I have experienced all. Personally, I stay clear from certain groupies, especially those who gossip, lie, or are rude to others. If they gossip about another, you can be sure that you will be the next victim!
Don Nemeth, (DNA Counseling).
This is where Joppa and Millo come in, and Rafi-owl portrays my counselor and mentor,
Don Nemeth has been a huge part of my and Jess’ healing in this journey of mental health, and with his permission, I have been setting little nuggets of his wisdom along the way through Story-telling with Joppa and Millo. Joppa means Beauty, and the meaning of Millo is Merciful. Jesus has been teaching me also through Joppa and Millo’s humor because laughter produces healing to the soul and body. I am beginning to be kinder to myself and setting boundaries for myself such as not trying to please everyone, because that will suck the life out of you. I am learning how not to take other people’s opinions of me to heart; God’s approval and opinion of me is all that matters, and that makes me free to be me. Joppa and Millo are merciful, compassionate and they search for beauty in their wreckage because they know that God can and will make beauty out of their ashes. They are acknowledging of each other’s pain, and hurts, and they do not dismiss these or are condemning even when they don’t quite understand the details. They are learning how to fellowship by sharing God’s love through edification, prayer and lifting each other up by the Word of God. I hope you enjoy this next story, and it brings laughter, enlightment, and healing to you as well. I pray that while you are searching for friendships, you will find the person God made you to be, and that being a friend of God, you will be a friend to yourself. I know this doesn’t make sense, but when you like you, and are kind to your person, other’s will see the freedom you have and glorify the Father because it is only by His Grace through Christ Jesus that you have received such liberty.